You know the one?  It’s got the women dancing on the front…each one a different color?

Yep. That’s the one.

It was the shirt that I wore when I felt really sick.  I used to think “I feel like shit but at least I have dancing women on my chest and they are having a good time!”  This image would bring me great comfort. 

It was the shirt I wore to garden, to play with the bunnies and to chat with the birds.

It was the shirt I wore when my fella and I fought about money, and when we found peace about money.

It was the shirt I wore when my son shared his secrets while hiking in the mountains.

It was the shirt I wore when my other son had a heart break and I used it to dry his tears.

This shirt had been with me for years.  Shirts that live that long, see a lot of life.  This shirt had seen a lot of my life.

Then one day I put it on and saw a big hole under the arm.

“No prob” I thought “I will just stitch that right up”

Then some months later I noticed a hole.

“Crap”  I thought “I can’t stitch that up.”

Then the hemming started to unravel.

The shoulder got a new rip.

Then one day, I looked down to see my bra showing through a decent sized hole where the fabric had worn away.  What would have caused that?  It certainly wasn’t the size of my boobs wearin away the fabric!

The truth was…it was the end of the road for this shirt.  It had put in a lot of good years.  It was time for it to retire. So what do I do with it?

Do I throw it away?

No.  Not today.

That  feels to irreverent…even for me!

I could cut it up and use it for a duster.

No!   That is just plain mean.

I could cut out the image and make it into a pillow.

Ya right.  That ain’t gonna happen.

So I washed it for the last time and gently folded it up and put it in my drawer.   And there it will live until I find a new use for it.  And if no use is found…

I am just gonna keep it for awhile.

Feel like sharing a story about one of your favorite pieces of clothing?

Let er rip! 

Absolutely crazy!

Cuz I have a new drug.

And like any other drug when used to the extent that I am using it… can make one feel hung over.  And irritable. Irritable if I do it too much…irritable if I don’t.  I am also barely noticing that things are falling to the wayside.  Or is that whey side?  I feel very anti social and I just want to be left alone…thank you very much!  I forget to eat and I just can’t be bothered makin any one else food…cuz really who cares?  And I haven’t left the house in days.  I am also wearing the same jammies and underwear that I was in this last weekend.  I think.  I am not sure.  The details are kind of blurry.

And like other addictions, this one is someone else’s fault.

Of course it is!!!

Who is the horrible person that turned me down the path of this mind numbing and time consuming addiction?

Rue.

Yep.  It’s Rue’s fault.

She turned me on to this new drug.

“Try these” she said “It will be really great!  You will love it!”

I never imagined when I joined her “Re imagining your Life” group…that this is what my life would become.

But, here it is.

This is my new re imagined life!!!

I jump out of bed in the morning…check my email…hoping that a bunch of clients are needing to cancel.  Pour myself a huge bowl of coffee…and what the heck…a glass of wine.  For later.  Cuz who can be bothered to get up and get one later in the afternoon.  Oops. I mean…later in the evening! And then I find the perfect spot.  Sometimes it is outside in the sun on the deck.  Sometimes it is the rocker in the indoor-outdoor room.  Sometimes I curl up on the couch…sometimes I just plop down on the floor.  And then I pick up my drug….hold it in my hand….open it up…and then….bliss~

Off to the highlands.

I guess this would be a good spot to blame the author as well.  So, damned you Diana Gabaldon!!!!  Your books are too frickin awesome!!!!  Your Outlander Series is so amazing!  I can’t even stop reading to bathe anymore!!!I don’t have a life any more cuz you are such a good writer!!!  This totally sucks.  AND THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT!!!!! And because I am a wee bit late to this fabulous collection of books (each book runs about 750 pages) I can read them all!!!  There are 7!!!!  And I am on number 3.

So there you have it.

And really, I gotta go. I have spent to much time writing this blog.  My dealer should be by soon too.  The fella in brown…with the brown truck.  He will be bringing me the last 4 books in the series.

See ya.  I probably won’t be back here for a few more weeks.

Hope you have a groovy day!

Each morning. I dutifully put in my little wordpress secret code to pull up the innards of my website.  I look to see if anyone has commented on any of my posts…which no one has because I have PWB.  Then I click the button that brings me here.

ADD NEW POST.

And I stare.

After staring for what seems to be a million minutes… and listening to wind blowing through my brain…I get up and look out the window.

Hmmmmm.

Nothin out there except the squirrels.  I just can’t write another post about squirrels!  Oh, and there are some bunnies playing on the lawn and eating the tulips…but, I just can’t write about bunnies again  A tiny mouse peeks up at me from the rock wall…nah…can’t write about you again either!  The mouse scurries off.

Then my fella will come in and see that I am staring off blankly into the distance…not writing…and will kindly ask “DO you want another cappuccino?”  Which I excitedly reply “Yay!!!  I would love that!!!”  Anything to end this mental check mate.

My fella and I see the world in very similar ways.  Think rorschach inkblots.  If I see a viking ship in the clouds…he can see it .  If he sees the image of Jerry Garcia in some rain drops on the window…I see it too.  We see all sorts of images in all sorts of places.  This maybe the result of too many hallucinogens in our younger years…but, I like to think that this is because we are made for each other…kindred souls…that kind of thing!

We like to play this game with our cappuccinos.  My fella will steam up the milk, then pour in the espresso and then we both stand over the cup to see what image shows itself.  We always see the same thing.  One morning we saw a coyote howling at the moon. Another morning we saw a ship heading towards Saturns rings.  This morning it was an image of our dog sitting up looking at the sun.

It’s this weird, cozy, fun little moment that we share together.

Then he heads off to his studio and I go back to my office.

I love these little moments that make up the morning.  And even though I might sit and stare at my blank computer screen… I will sip on my coffee and look for new images to emerge and I feel all warm and cozy inside.

So, how about you?  What are your favorite moments of your morning?  The ones that happen often and make you feel all warm and fuzzy inside…if only for just a moment!

I know you know what I am talkin about.

And since I have been postponing this whole event for a few years now (last year I wore shorts and an old tee shirt into the pool)!

…this is the year.

That.

I.

Have.

To.

Buy.

A frickin bathing suit!!!!!

I have been lookin at catalogues.

I have been lookin on line.

Hopin’ that I could find something that I could try on with out going into a store.  And I know you know what I am talkin about.

The mirrors.

Suck.

Well, actually…so do the bathing suits!

But alas, I gotta do it.  Cuz I don’t have wads of cash to pay all of the return postage for the bathing suits that won’t fit me….cuz most of them don’t.

The tops are always too big.

And the bottoms….are a nightmare.

So, I am bracing myself for this experience.

I have even done some tappin on this

Anyone else out there have to purchase one of these things this year?  Wanna go to the stores together?  I will bring the valium!

Okay…enough stalling…here is my 6 word clump on shopping for a bathing suit:

Bakini? Takini? One piece? Seriously? UGH!

Your turn

Today’s quote has been stolen from my fabulous friend Kerry.  She had posted this on her facebook page and I just had to steal it

Thanks Kerry!

“Everyone has a photographic memory, but some of us don’t have film.” –anonymous

I love this cuz it is optimistic….with the assumption that we all have a photographic memory

Have a memorable day!

Ta Ta for now~

Which brings me to last weekend.

Last Saturday, I started a project with a couple of friends of mine called “Process Painting.” I feel like my friends are kind of slummin it having me there with them cuz they are both amazing artists.  Randie is my brilliant friend who did the logo and design for my website.  She also creates gorgeous, whimsical pottery and plays with glass fushion.  Her pieces are stunning.  If you want to check out her stuff go to: www.luckydogarts.com

Janet is another talented artist.  She is going to be offering Process Painting classes in Boulder,CO in the near future.  If you are interested in her class info, let me know and I will pass you along to her:)

So, needless to say…I was a wee bit intimidated when I went into the studio … I am not an artist!  I am only pretending

Here is the jist of process painting.  You work on one painting for a handful of weeks.  Each painting session is about 5-7 hours long.  As you fill up a sheet of paper…more paper is added.  There is no plan.  It is not about the end result (ya right!).  It is all about moving through what is going on in your head using paint.  Moving through blocks and anxiety and mind chatter with color and texture.

For a way better description go to: www.processarts.com

After we visited for awhile, we headed down to the studio.  They had already started their paintings two weeks ago…I was crashin the party!  My mind immediately went into various versions of “I suck” after I saw what they had done.  Interesting.  I hadn’t even put paint on paper and my mind was already chiming in with nasty things.

That didn’t take long!

As I stood staring at the blank paper…wondering what the hell I was gonna do, Janet directed me back to the paint.  What color was I drawn too? I loved this and felt the shift immediately.  Looking away from the paper and focusing on the color freed me up.

Another interesting thing happened.  In my mind, I really wanted to paint with this beautiful color of sky blue…but that is not what I was drawn to.  Weird huh?!  So, I picked up my brush and dunked it into pink.  As soon as my brush had contact with the paper, I was off in paint land.  It felt so amazing to just let the color direct me….

Time disappeared.

We painted.

Sometimes we talked.

Most of the time we were quiet…in our own worlds… of paint, color, texture, movement, thoughts and emotions.  I had times when I felt young and child like.  I was just enjoying the feeling of the paint.  I was enjoying the colors and the feel of the paint brush in my hand.

Other times my critic would jump in and ask the proverbial question: “What the hell is that?” Or my mind would start to judge: “That looks ugly” or “That looks stupid” or my favorite “You really shouldn’t be here cuz you suck!”

One particular time I started to feel anxiety and Janet directed me back to the paint color.  “What color are you drawn too?” she asked.  This had a magical effect.  It refocused my energy.  And I moved through the anxiety.

After some time, we took a break for lunch. We visited some more and ate some yummy this’s and that’s and then went back to painting.  The break was good.  I came back excited and ready to go again. My color palette stayed with pinks, yellows and greens…no sky blue.  I was never drawn to the blue….my mind was…but, I wasn’t.  Somehow my inspiration took over and guided me~

After hours of painting, we sat down and chatted a bit about our processes.  We had gone through different things while painting together.  It had been a very internal experience with this very external medium.

Next weekend we will do it again.  I wonder if I will be drawn to the blue next time.  I wonder what this blue is doing in my mind?  My mind likes a plan.  And right now my mind keeps wanting to plan on the blue.

We shall see.

Now that it is Monday morning and I just know that you have been sitting on the edge of your seat waiting for me to post this post…yes folks…it’s time!

It’s time for another installment of “6 words.”  I gotta figure out a better title

Today I thought it would be fun to play with 6 words that describe how you feel waking up to a spring morning.  I know that sounds kinda cheesy, but there is something about a spring morning that feels really good.

Oh…and for those of you who are waking up to Autumn (Tara and the rest of you in Australia) feel free to play with an autumn morning

Here is mine:

Is that bird flirtin with me?

I can smell the spring dirt.

Wake UP!  Wake UP! Coffee’s on.

Is that bunny eating my daffodiles?

Okay.  I am done.  Kind of silly…but kind of fun

Have a lovely morning everyone!

I have recently begun a 6 month journey with Rue Hass called “Re-imagining your life.” The focus of this journey is to re- write…re- create…re- imagine a new story for your life.   And to take action and actually step into it Yikes!  We are a small group of visionaries who will be re-imagining a specific area of our lives together. Which is really cool~  I like the group energy!

I am going to be focusing on my work in the world.

I need help to even be able to re-imagine this.

Maybe those of you who have a chronic illness can relate.

One of the outcomes of being ill for so many years is that I stopped dreaming.  It became too painful to think of new possibilities for my work.  I could never get the ideas off the ground.  One day I would be feeling pretty good and get my foot on the gas pedal.  The next day I would be in severe pain and my foot would slam on the breaks.  Foot on the gas.  Foot on the break.  On and on it went until I felt so exhausted by all of this stop and start….I just decided to stop starting!

Now that I am out of pain most days I feel ready to dip my toe into this dreaming water.  Might even dunk all the way in.  I need some help clearing up the fear that once I dunk all the way in…something is going to happen that will slam my foot on the break all over again.

Yep.

There is fear there.  I can feel it in my chest.

This superstition that whispers: “You know what happens when you get too excited…when you get too into action…KABAM! It’s not safe to want.  Don’t do it!!!!”

I am gonna need to do a lot of tappin (EFT) on this…glad that I am gonna have some support!!!!

So, what does all of this have to do with my title? 6 words?

Well, one of our assignments is to play with 6 word autobiographies that speak to the new story we are imagining for ourselves.  I thought you, my fabulous readers, might have some fun with this too. You know how I like to share

Here is the idea.  Write down 6 words that describes a new intention for yourself…a little sound bite…or little word bite.   To amp it up…go ahead and do some EFT on these phrases.  Notice what comes up.  I am going to do these every Monday for a while~

I invite you to play along

Here are my 6 words (I am focusing on being able to dream up something snazzy for my work in the world):

Foot on gas and cruisin along.

What are your 6 words?  You can do more than one 6 word clump

Enjoy!

]]> http://lynnemorrell.com/2010/03/6-words/feed/ 10 http://lynnemorrell.com/2010/03/quote-friday-22/ http://lynnemorrell.com/2010/03/quote-friday-22/#comments Fri, 26 Mar 2010 16:58:17 +0000 Lynne Morrell http://lynnemorrell.com/?p=579 Here ya go…

One thing they never tell you about child raising is that for the rest of your life, at the drop of a hat, you are expected to know your child’s name and how old he or she is.

Erma Bombeck

This is very true.  My son just had a birthday….and for the life of me I forgot how old he is.  Then once I remembered, I realized why I forgot.

He is 25 years old.

25 years old.

I have a 25 year old son.

Seriously?

How the hell did that happen?

My other son…is 2 years younger…he is lucky cuz I can always subtract by 2:)  Well, maybe not always!

He turns 23 in a week or so.  The date slipped my mind….well, it didn’t slip my mind…it just disappeared from my mind.  Lucky for him…I wrote it down in my calendar with a big heart right next to his name.

Happy birthday my two fabulous sons….

I love you both to reeses pieces

Yep…he called me “Miss”!  Can you believe it?  I haven’t been called Miss for quite some time.

So, what was that all about?

Did he need his glasses prescription changed?

Maybe.

Was he just being polite?

Hmmmm….not sure.

Did his mom tell him how much women ‘of a certain age’ love being called Miss?

Possibly.

Did he really think I looked like a Miss?

Could be.

Or was it something else…something about me?  Cuz it’s always about me.  Right?!

So, what about me?

I was out and about with my fella having tons o’  fun.

We had just finished a nice walk down by the lake…

We were in a particularly playful mood in the store.  We weren’t playing tag or anything…but, pretty close.

We were smiling and cracking some hilarious jokes with each other.

I had found a super cool binder for my upcoming class….I was very very happy about that

Could it have been my expression of  all of this ‘happy happy joy’ vibes?

Whatever it was…and I could continue making stuff up here…when this young fella said what he said…it rang in my brain.

Obviously, it rang for awhile…cuz I am writing about it here.

Interestingly, those 5 words didn’t really make my day…my day was already being made.  It was already a super fun, light-hearted…easy breezy day.  Those words seemed to somehow give witness to the day that was being made.

Two people having fun finding a fun binder…

Two people being young and playful together….

Two people bringing out the best in each other.

Nice