“You are a child of the Universe. Your playing small doesn’t serve the world.”

—Nelson Mandel, Inaugural Speech, 1994

One of the ways we “play it small” is by not having integrity. What is integrity? To put it simply, it is the ability to be honest with your self. Simple as this sounds, it can be quite a challenge. We go to great lengths to keep the truth from ourselves, another word for this is denial. Denial may work for a while, though sooner or later the truth will try and surface. Keeping the truth away from our view is a major energy drainer. Struggling with this creates resistance. “What you resist will persist.”

Look at your life. Are you ready to get honest with yourself about which aspects of your life are working well and which are not? If you answered, “Yes”, let us begin! The first thing to remember is that when you get to the place of being willing to tell yourself the truth; this is the point from which change can happen.

Next, take a life inventory. How is your life really working? Look at the various areas: Health, relationships, finances, career, personal growth, fun and play, whatever you feel is important. How would you rate these on a scale of 1-10? When doing this exercise be aware of any “shame”, “blame”, or “shoulds”. Are there areas that you want to do differently, but find yourself stuck in judgment? Observe where you hold yourself back. Notice any areas of resistance. These areas of resistance may be where you are out of integrity, where you are not being honest with yourself. Acknowledging these aspects of your self can be challenging and uncomfortable. The idea is to get a clear and honest impression of your life.

Now I invite you to shift your focus towards your strengths. When looking at the areas of your life, identify what your skills are; what are you good at? What are your accomplishments? What choices have supported you? This is an opportunity to be honest with your self about the areas that you are brilliant in. Where do you shine? Again, notice your judgments. Observe where you hold your self back. Notice any areas of resistance. Be as honest with your self as possible.

The idea is to take responsibility for where your life is right now , both the positives and the negatives. Do you need to make some decisions around finances, your career, your health, or your relationships? Enlist the support of a neutral friend or a coach to support you in this process. Start making those choices that reflect who you really are, and give you the freedom to “play” big in your life.

If you want…contact me and let’s start playing a wee bit bigger!