Istock_000003356644xsmallGood day everyone!

Are any of you fabulous folks klutzy? 
Do you have any friends that are klutzy?
What is your reaction when you see someone trip or walk into something?

When I see someone trip of walk into something…my tendency is to laugh (as long as they are not hurt…of course!).  This is a sort of nervous laugh because the truth is… I am klutzy. 

I can’t help it!

There must be a klutzy gene…because I have it and have been this way for as long as I can remember.  No matter what I do to tune into a more graceful tone…I wind up walking into a wall, or tripping over my skirt, or running into some object.  This is NOT because I am not present and in my body.  I AM!!!!

Case in point:  I am in the grocery store the other day…shopping for this and that…relieved that I finally am in the store getting this done. I was looking at a variety of teas…reading the ingredients…enjoying all the variety…then, I took a box of peppermint tea off the shelf…and (I am not kidding) a bunch of other tea boxes came flying off the shelf.  They didn’t just fall off the shelf…they FLEW off the shelf.  Not just one box….not just two boxes…but a gazillion boxes!  And worst of all…there were witnesses! 

Now, this is not the only time this sort of thing has happened.   It has happened since I was a puny kid.  "It" got worse when I was in 6th grade.  I grew 7 inches that year and ended up at 5’9 and a 1/2…yikes!  My legs were like thin pipe cleaners and I ran into everything.  All the base boards by the kitchen sink where dented because I couldn’t stop my feet from banging into them. 


I had a neighbor friend and we were in a race to see who would be taller.  This was fun, until we were in 6th grade and we were growing like weeds and we became fearful that we would never stop growing.  Then, the game changed to "which one of us was going to be shorter!" 

My mother was very concerned about this!  I was growing too tall and I was running into too many things.  She used to yell at me in frustration:  "control your body Lynne!" 
She came up with the brilliant idea to try and help me achieve more grace by walking around with books on my head.  Are you kidding?  I couldn’t even make it down the hall without tripping!!!  So, I had my "lessons" weekly.  I would put a book on my head and try and walk around the room with it.  After dropping the book onto the floor and running into the side table with my moms favorite statue, knocking the statue over while trying to stop from knocking over the table….my mom moved me outside.  Well, that didn’t help either.  I would trip over the bricks and clip my foot on the hose…after awhile, I thought all of this was hilarious.  She didn’t!


Then there were the teen years.  Trying to be all laid back…talking to a guy…and I would trip, or run into things…or drop stuff…or or or…just fill in the blank!  Some fellas thought this was charming and some headed for the hills…very gracefully I might add!

My worst klutzy moment though was when I was going to a college in San Luis Obispo…I was trying to pass some stupid Algebra class so that I could finally get my college degree (I had tried to pass some form of this class 4 other times…don’t ask!).  Anyway, I was walking down a hallway with a friend and we were walking at a good clip, talking…when I walked full on into a cement pillar.  A huge cement pillar.  My books went flying and I saw stars!  My friend was horrified!  Needless to say, I didn’t understand a damned word in class that day!  Come to think of it…I never understood a damned word in that class on any day!

Obviously, this klutziness still prevails to this day.  If I am in a store with fancy pants dish ware, I won’t touch anything…I just browse.  I watch my friends touch things with utter grace and poise…how the hell do they do that?  I have tried many things to tame my inner klutz…yoga, dance, visualization…


Nothin…
Nothin has helped..
so, whatz next for me?

I think that it is time to embrace my inner klutz…throw it a party:)
Let go of the embarrassment…and just have a good time…though I don’t think I will be going into a china shop anytime soon!

Have a klutzy day:)



4 Responses to “How is it possible…to still be so klutzy?”

  1. Oh man, I am the same way! I think I have no depth perception and see the world and everything in it as completely flat or something :)

  2. For years, I have had the amazing talent of running into walls when I walk down the hall or hitting the door frame when I enter a room. I always thought it was related to my inner-ear disorder. But other than that I suppose I am graceful.

    I just realized I haven’t been running into walls or doorframes for the past year. I have replaced that with falling down the stairs. Huh.

    P.S. When I see someone fall or run into something, I have to say I never feel an impulse to laugh. I feel badly! That’s probably why I don’t like slapstick comedy so much.

  3. Ahhhhhh Klutz’s unite:) Lets start a group!

  4. Well I believe you were telling my story…except for the 5’9 part as I am only 5’4. I did the walking into a steel post not once but twice in my life. Once as 5th grader and once as a 20 year old stepping off the bus right in front of the guy I was attempting to impress. I spent the rest of the trip embarrassed and with a lump and black eye. I share your pain and shame.

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