Happy Holidays everyone~ This morning we woke up to brisk temperatures…-13.  Yep.  -13.  Brrrrrrrrr~  When we let our dog out she turned around and looked at us with eyes that said “Ya gotta be kidding me!”…ran out the dog door and the flap of the dog door…broke off.  The door was even too cold to flap!

I LOVE this kind of cold.  Now, I realize that I don’t have to get into my car and drive to work.  I do have to get my cozy blanket and wrap it around me with my steaming hot cup of coffee and walk all the way down the hall to my office:)

It is absolutely gorgeous outside.  A blanket of white snow, the sun coming up with a beautiful pink and purple introduction.  It takes my breath away…and if I were outside…I really would have my breath taken away!

On to the topic swirling around my cute little brain…

I have been thinking this weekend about entitlement.  My fella and I spent the weekend gathering documents together, figuring out how much we made last year, our business expenses and all that jazz.  Getting all of our information together to give to the lawyer. The more time we spent doing this, the more peace I felt…my fella felt it too.  As we looked at how much we made, all of the bills we paid, all of the things we did to expand our business, we just felt a big wash of gratitude.

Yesterday, I became aware of this sense of entitlement being washed away.  I have been feeling very self righteously entitled these last couple of weeks regarding health care and the insurance company.  These types of thoughts have been causing me to feel anxious and unsafe.  These thoughts of entitlement confuse my “wants” and my “needs.”  My wants were for the insurance company to pay for what they promised to pay…my wants were for the insurance company to be “fair.” My wants were to be able to pay my bills.

My needs are something completely different.

I need to have a home, food, clothing… Maslow’s hierarchy of needs…check!

I need to feel love for others…check!

I need to feel love for myself…check (most of the time)!

I need to contribute…check!

I need a sense of community…check!

I NEED freedom…check!

I need humor…check times a gabillion!!

I need beauty…check…all around me…everyday!

There are some needs that are tangible (food, safe shelter, clothing).   The rest of our needs tend to be the intangibles…those “things” that we can’t necessarily touch.  You can also call these your values.  Once you get to know what your needs/values are…then you can tune into ways of meeting those needs.  During this weekend, I realized that all my basic needs are being met.  The other ones are too…I just needed to refocus my energy.  Reminding myself that my wants are very different from my needs.

If you are not sure what your needs/values are…trying playing with these two questions;

1.  Think of a time that you were in the flow…a “peak experience.”  During a peak experience, values are usually present…needs are being met.  Look for the intangibles.

2.  Think of an experience that was the opposite of a peak experience.  This experience caused you intense frustration, irritation…etc.  What were the needs…the values… that were missing from this experience.  Look for the intangibles.

Play with this for awhile.  Come up with a list of about 5 values/needs…those intangible “things” that must be present in order for you to feel in the flow…the feel that all is well…to KNOW that you are thriving.

When you are feeling entitled….tune into what the thoughts are…you most likely are looking at a “want” rather than a “need!”

Enjoying the holidays through the eyes of your needs/values will shift the interpretation of what is going on in your world economically.  It will give you some breathing room.  It will soften your heart….might even bring you some joy and peace.

Isn’t that what the holidays are about anyway?