Hey there lovely readers!

I was in the shower this morning…which is where I get lots of my blog ideas (sorry for the visual). Anyhoo, I started thinking about my brain. And how sometimes it feels as though my brain is full. Its like it is filled with empty carbs. Its like I ate a loaf of french bread…but instead of french bread…I ate a bunch of thoughts.

Not just any thoughts…

…but, WORRIED thoughts.

Worried thoughts are like empty carbs of the mind.
Oh, maybe that would be a good bumper sticker! Hmmmmmm I will think about that later:)

When my brain fills up with worried thoughts, it can seem that I am busy doing something of importance. My brain is busy worrying if my son is eating well living on his own (probably not!) or if my other son is locking his apartment at night. Both worries…if stayed with long enough (a few minutes or less) will ultimately end in their deaths. Ethan will die because he is not eating healthy food and Corey will die because someone is going to go into his apartment and stab him. I know it! I just know it!

Or rather, that worried mind knows it. It can build a case for the most horrible of circumstances. And I am left feeling exhausted and stressed out. For what? I am left feeling as though I have had no mental nutrition. My mind feels full and thrashed…and so do I!

So, what is worrying all about anyway?

Are we born worriers?
Are we taught to be worriers?
Is it in our cellular structure?

Yes, Yes and Yes!

Worrying is part of a complicated inner defense strategy. It goes something like this:
Oh no! ____________ is freaking me out. What if ____________ happens and that will cause ______________ to happen and then ___________ will happen and then we will all die!!!!!!

We worry that something that isn’t happening, might happen and if that none existent thing that might happen happens…then something really bad will happen. And if that really bad non existent thing happens then someone will die….(fill in whatever the end result is that you worry will happen if this non existent thing happens).

Wow…that was a mouth full!

I have never met a human that doesn’t worry about something. Now some folks have worrying down to an art form whereas other folks just dabble in it once in awhile. I used to be the former…but, now I am more of a dabbler. Hmmmmmm I might be lying about that. Not sure. If I think about this long enough I am sure I can lead the possibility of my lying all the way to someone dying….yes, I am that good at this !

Anyway, worrying is a mind numbing waste of time.

I remember years ago, I worried about my boys eating sugar or watching certain cartoons…or whatever I could come up with. Now, I look back on all of those worries and just have to laugh. The worries are still there but now they are bigger and more grand.

Will the next girl break their hearts? Or will they be the ones to break someone else’s heart? Will they be safe with sex? Will they find their passions? Who will they find love with? What if they are afraid to make mistakes? What if I didn’t teach them well enough that there are NO mistakes? What if I didn’t do a good enough job? What if they don’t clean their bathrooms? What if they aren’t eating healthy? What if they don’t lock their doors at night?

The list can go on and on if I let it. All worries can go on and on if we let them. That is the thing about worry…its like a mental virus that expands quickly and takes over any healthy thriving thoughts that might have been hangin’ out.

What I know personally about worry is that even if some worries come true, we figure out how to handle things. We can always figure out a way. Wellbeing always is there if we want to find it.

When we move past the period of worry and we have some time to tap into the more broader perspective, we can see that there was no need to worry. That all was well, even if it wasn’t. The things that I worried about as a young adult, are gone. I see from my broader perspective that all was just fine. I remember worrying about money alot when I was in my early 20’s. I had two sons, I was a student and a single parent by the age of 25. I was worried that I wouldn’t be able to pay my bills, or buy shoes when the boys needed them…or whatever. The amazing thing was that things always had a way of working out.

Now at 45 years old…when I catch myself worrying I do what I can to shift the thinking. Because I know when I am 90 years old and looking back at my 40’s, I will think: "Ah, I wish that I hadn’t worried myself so…because non of it really matters. All is well even when its not!"

Hope you all had a fabulous weekend.

I had a lovely day on Saturday.  Went up to the mountains for a hike with a girlfriend of mine.  It was beautiful up there.  The aspens are just beginning to turn yellow…gorgeous!  We made friends with a little chipmunk.  This little friend hung out with us while we hung out by a small lake and talked about art.

Today was cloudy and cool.  I spent the day in pain, watching romantic comedies and avoiding talking to friends on the phone.  Ah contrast….don’tcha just love it?!

Okay…on to the Tarot Card for this week.  It is a good one!

This weeks card was chosen from The Housewives Tarot: A Domestic Divination Kit with Deck and Instruction Book~

SIX OF SWORDS
Revelations * Transition * Better Times Ahead

"After spending so much time and energy looking for a way out of your troubles, you’ve finally seen the light.  With a spark of insight, it looks like you can finally put your troubles behind you.  This is a transitory period in your life; you will be moving out of the darkness and into the sunshine.  It’s time to release all the pent-up anxiety and aggression and make way for happier times."

Love this! 

So, think of some ways that will allow you to release any remaining pent up anxiety.
How about some ways that can assist you in releasing that remaining aggression?  A good run?  A hard hike?  A long journaling session?  Painting a room?  Clearing the summer plants in your garden?  There are so many ways to do this.

Makin’ ways for happier times…not too shabby!!!!!

Have fun!
Talk to you tomorrow!

Hello fabulous folks!
Well, my vertigo is lessening each and every day.  I was even able to go on a walk today…though Mike said that I looked like I had been drinking! I was swaying a bit!   Hopefully, tomorrow will be even better!

So, without further ado…this weeks card was pulled from Meredith Young-Sowers "Angelic Messenger Cards."

Choice

Present Challenge:  Making decisions that reflect reverence for yourself and all other life.

"You have drawn this card to help you appreciate the difference between making choices from the perspective of your spirit, your inner mind and being, and making them according to the needs posed by your analytical or outer mind.  The calmness and serenity of your life may be obscured by the continual demands made by your outer mind as it seeks to have its needs and desires filled.

You’ve drawn this important card of Rejuvenation to alert you to the need for greater calmness and inner peace.  Although you may work hard at accomplishing the goals you have chosen, in order to find lasting satisfaction you are being called upon to consider the intentions with which you make decisions.  You are being guided to consider yourself as part of a vast network of like and responsible for its well-being as well as your own."

Angelic Message:  Choice

You and we, your angelic teachers, are each essential parts of the system, neither more nor less.  And so each living thing must learn to responsibly exercise its right to draw from the resources of the largest systems of life, accepting that it will need to give back to the Earth and to the Creator.  Every living thing ultimately relinquishes its form in order to nourish a larger, everlasting system."

APPLICATION:  Watch the criteria you tell yourself are important in making choices.  When facing a choice, even a small one, first take a deep breath.  When you make choices while breathing shallowly, you are using only your outer mind, or "functioning self," not your spirit or inner mind, which allows for full participation.

Ask yourself, "Whom will this choice benefit?"  Each choice that has your spirit behind it will benefit you and others equally.  Ask yourself, "How easy is it for me to make this choice?"  If it is very easy, then consider that perhaps you have only sought to reaffirm those attitudes and beliefs that you already hold.  Imagine having to stretch to find a comfort level with a choice that suggests your needs and wants may need to be suspended or altered in order to give or share with others.

Hello fabulous folks! 

I want to welcome all the new readers that are stopping by.  "Musings From the Edge" is steadily growing and I love knowing that there are readers coming back again and again.  I invite you to comment and share when the desire flows through you.  It’s the comments that bring what I write full circle. I appreciate each and every comment…except of course, those weird comments that I have to delete that come from some spam machine that really wants me to have bigger boobs and a larger penis!  Hmmmmm not sure how that would work out!

Ready for the Tarot Card for this week?

This weeks card was chosen from The Housewives Tarot: A Domestic Divination Kit with Deck and Instruction Book.

QUEEN OF SWORDS

Sharp tongued * Stern * Mournful

"This Queen has seen her share of hardship and sorrow.  Never fear…she’s pulled herself through the dark days by being tough as nails, with a cast-iron will and razor-sharp wit.  The Queen of Swords keeps a stiff upper lip and holds her head high in the face of adversity.  Unfortunately, she can also be a total bitch!  While it’s admirable to seem impervious to enemies, don’t unleash that coldness on loved ones!"

Oooohhhhhhh….good one!  Anyone feeling bitchy lately?   I love this card because as humans we sometimes have the tendency to be all repressed and smiley to the world out there…and come home and rip into the folks we love.  Ah stress…ain’t it grand?

So…what to do?…what to do?

Here are 5 ways to deal with your inner bitch (guys…you too are bitchy…so this ain’t just for the gals!)

1. State clearly that the bitch is back!  This one is my ultimate favorite.  Because it just gives the bitch some freedom.  When your inner bitch has taken over your mind and actions…let your loved ones know that this force is running the show.  You can say something like this:
"Alright everyone…I am in a MOOD so you better do what I say or stay out of my way…and hope that tomorrow is a better day!"

2.  Get the hell out of dodge!  This is a good strategy too.  If you know that you are going to rip everyone’s head off….leave!  Go for a walk…a drive (unless you feel like ramming your car into other cars!)…go into your bedroom and lock the door.  Get away from your loved ones so you don’t say something that you may regret later.  Breaks are great….so take one!

3.  Use duct tape!  This is for those times when you can’t leave.  You can use the duct tape for yourself.  Just cut a strip (there are more gentler tapes out there…but this one really sticks!) and place it firmly over your mouth.  If you must say something bitchy and nasty it will come out like this:  "Youafkfdjakfjlkjdffucksakfjdjaiuffafjkfjshitlkajdkf!" 
This way no one gets hurt!

4.  Clean your house!  This is a tricky one.  Cleaning and organizing can really release stress and gives the bitch something to really bitch about.  This could back fire….leaving the bitch even more bitchy at the family.  Especially, if what made you feel bitchy in the first place…was the dirty and disorganized house!  So…if this is your situation…turn it around!  Make your family clean the house:)  Watching others clean can really soothe the inner bitch…although this may back fire too.  Especially, if the bitch wants the house cleaned in such a way and the family JUST CAN"T DO IT RIGHT!!!!! 

5.  Sit down, by yourself and take a listen!  What is that bitch trying to say to you?  What is that bitch upset about?  What does that bitch want and need?  Writing in a journal is a great way to dialog with the bitch…let this energy speak through the pages without censoring….just let it rip!  Venting is an awesome way to get energy to start moving.  So instead of venting in a nasty way to your loved ones…because let’s be honest…they won’t really appreciate what you want to share…vent to your journal!  Your journal doesn’t mind and it won’t get its feelings hurt!

Well….those are my helpful hints for the day!
Talk to you soon:~)

I first want to apologize for yesterdays blog set up….I realized this morning that because of my blog design, all the words from Claudia’s write up couldn’t be seen.  You can read all of the ezine on her site:  moonsurfer.com.

Since Self Sabotage is up right now and the possibility to break free from some old habits is clearly a part of this energy…lets talk a bit about what self sabotage is. 
Yikes!!!! 

Have you already clicked away?  If you decide to stay….I will make this as light and interesting as I can!

According to Caroline Myss in her book Sacred Contracts: Awakening Your Divine Potential  the archetype of The Saboteur is "the Guardian of Choice."   Here is a quote from Caroline’s book:  "…the Saboteur archetype is a neutral energy within you that usually makes itself known through disruption.  It can sabotage your efforts to be happy and successful if you are not aware of the patterns of thought and behavior that it raises in you.  It can cause you to resist opportunities.  The Saboteur is the mirror that reflects your fears of taking responsibility for yourself and for what you create."

Ring any bells?

Ah…ya!

One of the ways I still sabotage myself is when I receive an acknowledgment for some thing that I did well…I tend to reflect that acknowledgment back to the person giving it to me.

It goes something like this:

Other Person:  "Oh Lynne, you have helped me so much.  There are not many people that I feel so supported by and not judged by.  Thank You for all that you do!"

ME:  "Ah well, it is you who is doing the work.  Right back at ya babe!" (or dude…whichever the case may be!)

This is totally the voice of my saboteur who refuses to take responsibility for a job well done.  I appreciate that I can hear this voice now…and once take notice of it…I can shift it.  Sometimes, I am even able to say "Thank you so much!  I love our work together too!"

Baby steps for sure!!!!

Since the Saboteur is the "guardian of choice" it is one of the players in our ability to survive in this physical world.  The less choices we have….the less freedom we feel.  The less freedom we have the more we feel that our survival is somehow threatened.  The shadow of the Saboteur is showing up when we take actions that shut down our ability to choose things that allow our spirits to thrive. 

Think of the Shadow Saboteur as "of the mind."  The Shadow voice tends to talk from the voice of fear and feels very constrained.  The "Guardian of Choice" is more connected with intuition…with inspiration…with that which feels expansive rather than contracting. 

Remember to that intuition ALWAYS  ALWAYS ALWAYS feels like expansion!  It DOES NOT come as a voice of warning!!!!!!

Instead our intuitive voice says: 

"Oh, lets turn left today and stop by that store and see if that shirt is on sale!"
Once at the store you find that the shirt is gone but one that fits you even better is there and at the perfect price.  And on top of that…you find out that if you had gone straight home you would have sat in a traffic jam.

Intuition feels like choice….feels like freedom…feels like expansion.

Okay….so, here are a few questions that you can ask yourself to explore your Saboteur.

*Does this thought/feeling/action feel expansive or contracting?
*Does this action bring a sense of thriving?
*Does this thought/feeling/action bring me a feeling of bondage or freedom?

Look to the thoughts that shut you down and threaten your feelings of thriving….those just may be the Shadow voice of the Saboteur. 

Remember also…that this exploration is NOT about beatin the crap out of yourself…this is a neutral energy.  Think of it as more of a navigational instrument…it will tell you exactly where you are in your thoughts.  It will tell you exactly what you are afraid of.  With this knowledge you can then explore the thoughts that bring you a sense of thriving…of freedom.

If your Saboteur has been running the show in certain areas of your life for awhile…the first step is to take note.  What is the fear that is driving the shadow? 

There are some excellent modalities that clear fears out of the energy system.  EFT and LEAP are the ones I use…you could also try some Art Therapy, Healing Touch, Reiki, or even Yoga…whatever resonates with you.  Clear the fear…and that will lead to more choices…which will lead to a greater sense of freedom!

This is the time to look at this energy…it seems as though the energy of the planet, and the stars are aligned to help support this process!

Give me a call if you want some support!  This is definitely one of my specialties! 

Well folks, I KNOW that I am late in talking about this…in fact, as you read this it probably has already passed.  The information is still interesting and the astrological significance is worth noting…and possibly doing a little thinking about the possibilities!

What the hell am I talking about…you might ask?

On August 28th there will be a total lunar eclipse.
Here are the times…in case you are having insomnia while reading this and you want to check it out!

PARTIAL ECLIPSE BEGINS:  1:51am PSD * 3:51am MST * 4:51am EST
TOTAL ECLIPSE BEGINS:    2:52am PSD * 3:52am MST * 5:52am EST
TOTAL ECLIPSE ENDS:      4:23am PSD *  5:23am MST * 6:23am EST       
PARTIAL ECLIPSE ENDS:    5:24am PSD *  6:24am MST

As I look outside right now here in Loveland, Colorado…we are having cloud cover.  I am not sure that I will be able to witness this cool event…but, I am gonna get up a give it a go!  If I can…and you decide to check it…lets say "HI" to each other while witnessing this amazing event:)

Bringing this a bit closer to home…meaning…how will this lunar event effect you personally, here is some of the jist of whatz happenin’!

This is copied from Claudia over at "Moonsurfing Ezine"