Hello fabulous folks!

I just spent a bit of time reading some fun blogs.  Lots of fun stories to share regarding Halloween adventures.  My Halloween was sorta boring…my fella didn’t get home until late…and my boys have lives of their own (I wish my friends had knocked me upside the head and warned me about this sort of thing as I raised them to be independent, life seeking people!  What the hell was I thinking!!!!!!!!????????)

Anyhoo, I was home alone…waiting for trick-or-treaters.  We…I mean "I" only had a few groups of kids.  Some small cute kids in fun costumes…
…and then a group of teenagers that seemed annoyed and in conflict with themselves. 

They rang the door bell…I opened the door to see a group of kids looking sheepish…or something. 

Me:  "Uh….ya gonna say "trick or treat?"

Them (looking really weirded out):  "Uh…(grumble) Ya whatever!"

Me:  "Well, ya got guts kids to be out trick or treating…here have the rest of the candy.  Have a good night and don’t get into too much trouble!"

Finally I got a smile:) as I dumped the rest of our candy into their bags…oops I mean their pillow cases!

Then (grins all around):  "Ya thanks"

Ahhhhhhh Halloween….so sweet!

Maybe next year my fella and I will go see some music instead!

I am married to a gear head.  Yep!  My fella is a gear head.  He is always looking for that perfect sounding guitar…that perfect sounding amp…just the right tubes for his amps…on and on the list goes.  He is a sound slut.  He can’t help himself. 

He is looking for the holy grail of sound!

This year it has been about ’67 fender amps.  He now has two of them.  Oh, I mean three of them…he has two big ones…and the other day he brought home a smaller one.  Easier to carry to rehearsals…yep.  That makes sense:) 

In the past year, I have had many tortured moments of being called into the studio to "hear the difference" between amp tubes.  Yep.  Amp tubes!  I listen patiently (*cough* most of the time) as he puts in one type of tube and then another type of tube and asks me which one I like.  Sometimes, I hear a difference…but most of the time…hmmmmmmm…not so much.  But he does! 

He is looking for the holy grail of sound.

Hasn’t quite found it yet.

I thought he had when he brought home these amps…I thought that the insanity was over.  Uh….Nope!  Now, its about the tubes.  Oh, and guitars.

My fella and I often talk about the holy grail.  Within the mythology there is usually a process of spiritual enlightenment that must take place before the person can even go and look for the grail.  I tend to focus on what happens to folks who are looking for the holy grail…..they go mad!!!!!!  And what happened to the poor fella who found it?  Was that Lancelot?  Anyway, I think he exploded…or something.  Whatever it was…it wasn’t a good thing. 

I got to thinking about this whole concept…the metaphor of the holy grail.  In modern day culture the holy grail is seen as an all-but-unattainable goal.  I think that most of us have our own personal holy grail.  It’s not just for gear heads! 

Some folks have "the relationship" holy grail:
(Imagine the "Dating game" music in the background)

The perfect relationship with a person who NEVER lets me down.  Who ALWAYS wants to listen to me.  Who makes tons of money, never travels, is home by 6:00pm and will help fold the laundry.  This person ALWAYS shares their feelings with me in a kind way.  This person NEVER calls me on my crap…but, I can ALWAYS call them on theirs.  Once I find this person….then I WILL BE HAPPY!

Some folks have "the money" holy grail:
(Oh…I know…."Money" by Pink Floyd playing in the background)

When I find a way to make, win, inherit (whatever) _______ amount of money, I will be able to relax.  I will be free.  This magic amount of money will give me peace, serenity and adventure.  When this money comes into my life, I will pay off all debt and have everything I want…..and THAN I WILL BE HAPPY!

Some folks have "the job" holy grail:
(I am not sure what music could be in the background for this…maybe some Miles Davis)

When I finally get this perfect job, I will have lots of money, be treated as I deserve, I will meet fantastic friends.  I will have a wonderful boss who looks to me for decisions and is always supportive to me when I need to take time off.  I will finally use my skills and talents.  My life will be complete and then I WILL BE HAPPY!

Okay
I will stop:)

My holy grail is finding that perfect place to live where I want to stay….FOREVER!!!!  I have never found it.  I have lived in gorgeous places and after a handful of years, I am ready to move along.  If I travel, I imagine myself living in that place that I am traveling too.  Maybe I am just a gypsy at heart…because I do enjoy the places that I have lived.  I just get bored after awhile and I am ready for a new adventure.   I never want to go back to where I have been. 

I have been in Colorado for about 7 years now…and I am ready to move again.  My new dream is Washington, or England…or maybe Scotland.  Oh…Canada would be cool too.  This next move…whenever we make it…will be the last one.  I promise.  I will be so fulfilled that i don’t want to move.  I promise!  Hmmmmmmmmm sounds like that madness is beginning to surface.  Uh oh…better warn my family!

So…what is your holy grail?
What is that "all-but-unattainable" goal you are looking for?
Where is your inner madness?

You know why it is madness?  Because when we look for anything to be perfect…to make us happy…especially when it outside of ourselves…we are screwed.  We are banging our heads against a wall.  Ah….but, it is an interesting journey anyway:~)

Oh…please do share.  I love talking about madness!!!!!!

Hello there fabulous readers!  Today’s blog post is a joke…because I LOVE jokes…unless they are too crude… then I just have to zone out and hope that the whole thing is over soon.  This joke was sent to me by my fabulous friend Sheryl. 

Enjoy:)

Good day everyone!

Are any of you fabulous folks klutzy? 
Do you have any friends that are klutzy?
What is your reaction when you see someone trip or walk into something?

When I see someone trip of walk into something…my tendency is to laugh (as long as they are not hurt…of course!).  This is a sort of nervous laugh because the truth is… I am klutzy. 

I can’t help it!

There must be a klutzy gene…because I have it and have been this way for as long as I can remember.  No matter what I do to tune into a more graceful tone…I wind up walking into a wall, or tripping over my skirt, or running into some object.  This is NOT because I am not present and in my body.  I AM!!!!

Case in point:  I am in the grocery store the other day…shopping for this and that…relieved that I finally am in the store getting this done. I was looking at a variety of teas…reading the ingredients…enjoying all the variety…then, I took a box of peppermint tea off the shelf…and (I am not kidding) a bunch of other tea boxes came flying off the shelf.  They didn’t just fall off the shelf…they FLEW off the shelf.  Not just one box….not just two boxes…but a gazillion boxes!  And worst of all…there were witnesses! 

Now, this is not the only time this sort of thing has happened.   It has happened since I was a puny kid.  "It" got worse when I was in 6th grade.  I grew 7 inches that year and ended up at 5’9 and a 1/2…yikes!  My legs were like thin pipe cleaners and I ran into everything.  All the base boards by the kitchen sink where dented because I couldn’t stop my feet from banging into them. 

I had a neighbor friend and we were in a race to see who would be taller.  This was fun, until we were in 6th grade and we were growing like weeds and we became fearful that we would never stop growing.  Then, the game changed to "which one of us was going to be shorter!" 

My mother was very concerned about this!  I was growing too tall and I was running into too many things.  She used to yell at me in frustration:  "control your body Lynne!" 
She came up with the brilliant idea to try and help me achieve more grace by walking around with books on my head.  Are you kidding?  I couldn’t even make it down the hall without tripping!!!  So, I had my "lessons" weekly.  I would put a book on my head and try and walk around the room with it.  After dropping the book onto the floor and running into the side table with my moms favorite statue, knocking the statue over while trying to stop from knocking over the table….my mom moved me outside.  Well, that didn’t help either.  I would trip over the bricks and clip my foot on the hose…after awhile, I thought all of this was hilarious.  She didn’t!

Then there were the teen years.  Trying to be all laid back…talking to a guy…and I would trip, or run into things…or drop stuff…or or or…just fill in the blank!  Some fellas thought this was charming and some headed for the hills…very gracefully I might add!

My worst klutzy moment though was when I was going to a college in San Luis Obispo…I was trying to pass some stupid Algebra class so that I could finally get my college degree (I had tried to pass some form of this class 4 other times…don’t ask!).  Anyway, I was walking down a hallway with a friend and we were walking at a good clip, talking…when I walked full on into a cement pillar.  A huge cement pillar.  My books went flying and I saw stars!  My friend was horrified!  Needless to say, I didn’t understand a damned word in class that day!  Come to think of it…I never understood a damned word in that class on any day!

Obviously, this klutziness still prevails to this day.  If I am in a store with fancy pants dish ware, I won’t touch anything…I just browse.  I watch my friends touch things with utter grace and poise…how the hell do they do that?  I have tried many things to tame my inner klutz…yoga, dance, visualization…

Nothin…
Nothin has helped..
so, whatz next for me?

I think that it is time to embrace my inner klutz…throw it a party:)
Let go of the embarrassment…and just have a good time…though I don’t think I will be going into a china shop anytime soon!

Have a klutzy day:)

Hello there fabulous readers!
We are having lots of rain here today…I am loving it:)  We have also been having power outages all day long.  So, hopefully I can type this post up and the power will stay on. 

I wanted to share a funny story with you all concerning my kids and the rules that I had for them while they were growing up.  In our home we had three rules…which were posted prominently on the fridge.

1.  We don’t hurt ourselves

3.  We don’t hurt our environment

I was not very interested in imposing lots of rules on the boys…but, I also didn’t want them to turn into little monsters either. 

It’s a fine line indeed!!!! 

This set of rules seemed to cover most things that happened.  I didn’t need to run around saying "NO!" too often…I was more interested in saying "YES!" to what they wanted to explore.  With lots and lots of redirecting.

As the boys got a little older, it became apparent that I needed to add an addendum to the list.  The rule that I wanted to add didn’t quite fit into any on the list…but, I was able to stretch things enough to add it under #2:  "We don’t hurt each other." 

I was the parent after all and if I couldn’t manipulate the system…oops!!  I mean…(Cough) work the system to teach them how to be in the world in a thoughtful way…what good was the system?  I mean…come on!!!!!

The new rule was: 

No interrupting mom when she is on the phone unless there is:
a. blood
or
b. bones protruding from your skin…where there shouldn’t be any!

Now, because I was the parent and had already established some sort of authority over my free spirited sons, they took this and didn’t question it at all.  Well….at least they didn’t seem to question it!

One day, I was on the phone and Ethan (my oldest son) kept asking if I could make some brownies for a snack.  I looked at him with what I hoped was strong annoyance and frustration.
No blood or bone protrusions…I told him to read the rule list and stop interrupting me.  I would be off the phone in about 5 minutes and then we could talk.  He rolled his eyes and walked away. 

Next, Corey (my youngest son) came up and started asking if I could make some brownies for a snack…I repeated again (with more annoyance and frustration) that I was on the phone and to go read the rules and not interrupt me.  I told him I would be about 5 more minutes and then we could talk.

Soon, I realized that they had both headed out to play and was thinking that this rule thing was working really well.  I was actually feeling sorta smug about it.  I continued my phone conversation telling my friend how well the new addendum was working.  She was thinking about giving it a try because her kids were always interrupting her phone conversations too! 

This was turning out to be a great idea!!!!

ABout 10 minutes later…Corey came running into the house with Ethan on his heals.  They were both very upset with something…and Corey had what looked like blood all over him.  I hung up the phone and went running to the kitchen to see what had happened. 

"Mom, a mountain Lion attacked me!"  Corey said…in a very intense voice…with a bit of a grin
"It did mom…I saw it too!"  Ethan said…with a total grin

As I looked closer, I started to laugh.  Corey had smeared (with Ethan’s help) raspberries all over his arms and face so that it looked like blood. 

Charming!

"Well, all of this so I would get off the phone and make brownies?"  Said me

They both grinned and started to laugh!

"Guess we better wash you up Corey.  Let’s get the bowls out and make some brownies!"  I had to laugh…this was hilarious and incredibly creative!

We had so much fun that afternoon! 

I guess rules are OK up to a point and then ya just gotta go have some fun and make some brownies!

Hello lovely readers!

First, I want to say "thank you" to Jenny over at "Using My Power For Good", for nominating me for the Rockin’ Girl Blogger Award.  Very fun indeedy!

I would like to pass on the warm fuzzies by nominating Alix North.  I love her blog.  If you haven’t checked it out…just click on her name and take a read!  Besides being a fabulous friend, she is also a gifted writer.

The last few days, I have been working on a blog post about the stories that we tell ourselves.  How we filter the world through these stories.  So far it is an informative blog post…but not very funny.  I have decided to shelf it and wait for some humor inspiration to jazz it up a bit. 

Instead of writing about the stories we tell ourselves…I am gonna shift gears and talk about the stories that we tell our kids!

Ready?
Okie Dokie!

When my sons were young, I used to love reading stories to them.  We would read books during the day and at night they would be tucked in to bed by stories as well.  Not only did we read lots and lots of books…we also would make stories up.  Sometimes the boys would make up stories and sometimes I would make up stories…and sometimes we would make stories up together.

Recently, my youngest son was reminding me of a story that I told him…many, many moons ago!  I am embarrassed to say that he had carried this story in his young heart for years, wondering if it was true.  Oops!

Here’s the story:

One day…I was walking in the forest.  I heard a small cry.  Behind a big and beautiful redwood tree, I found a basket with a baby in it.  The baby had bright blue eyes, blonde hair and a dimpled chin. 

I picked up the baby…it was a boy!  It was a beautiful baby boy. 
In the basket was a folded up piece of paper. 
I opened it up.
It said that this baby was born to a family of Trolls.  Because human babies are not allowed to live with Trolls…they were offering this baby to me.
I was over come with joy.
Of course I will raise this baby.  I knew from the moment I looked at him that I would love him and be his mom.

According to my son, I had various additions to this story (I don’t remember that!).  But, the story always ended with me being so happy to have this amazing little boy that I loved dearly. 

Well, a part of him wondered if this story was true!

Really?

I thought he knew I was makin’ the story up!


Okay, so maybe I wasn’t as good of a mom as I thought!

Watch out watcha tell your kids:)